Okay. So today my school played host to a dance competition for little girls in Davis County. I didn't have any part in it, as the extent of my dance ability is confined to head banging and the Beginner level in DDR. I didn't even have to watch. But the whole ordeal, with the posters and the concessions and the sparkly leotards for sale and the little girls plastered with makeup, made me SO angry.
The world of competetive dance, especially here in Utah, is like a jungle. Only the strongest and bravest survive, and if you are weak, cry easily, or harbor a physical need for food and water, you are automatically unfit. Ever see the movie Mean Girls? That scene where all the girls in the high school go bananas and start attacking each other? It's JUST like that. Not high school, particularly, but definetly the dance community. The young woman who can dance and stay out of that trap is a very rare, very lucky girl. It is tough! It's such a high-pressure, competetive environment, one that makes 16 and 17 year old girls cry on a daily basis. They cry for all kinds of reasons, not just that dancing automatically makes their lives dramatic. They cry because the skin on their scalps is being rubbed raw and peeling off. They cry because every day is a new battle to stay thin and gorgeous. If you don't feel like being gorgeous, too bad. You suck it up, suck it in, and be that superstar that Mommy knows you are! They cry because their muscles are torn and hyperextended, and there's a teacher in front of them, yelling that they can't stop or they can find another instructor. They come home every night worn-out, dehydrated, and without a normal teenage exsistance.
Wanna know the worst part? In order to get to this point, these girls have been doing that since they were three.
They woke up, pulled on their sparly outfits, painted their faces and glued on fake eyelashes, to go to a competition at some high school. When they were three.
These are CHILDREN! These girls are pulling their little bodies around in ways that little girls' bodies are not yet physically equiped to handle! Little bodies are not meant to do those things! I guess it's not going to kill them, but when they get older, are they going to have issues with their muscles and tendons?
I don't have a huge argument to pitch about the physical aspect. What bothers me more is the social, psycological part. These precious little people are being thrust into an environment where they are forced to compete, and they compete to WIN! In this community, they learn that it is not okay to lose. They learn that losing is avoidable, and that if you are living up to all you can be, it will not happen to you. They are being taught to compete with other girls in a vicious way. Do you remember your little league soccer games when you were a kid? No matter who won, at the end of the game, you all lined up and slapped hands with the other team? "Good game, good game, good game, good game..." Dance isn't like that! It's about WINNING. Eyes on the prize. It doesn't matter if your twin sister is in the opposing company, you will WIN at all costs. Only the best girls win, and only the winners are worth a scrap of flourescent pink spandex.
These girls are learning to compete against each other on the dance floor, and it hurts their ability to keep friends. They are also learning that hey MUST win to be accepted. Those little dears have a rude awakening headed their way when they realize that losing HAPPENS. No matter how cool you are or how hard you work, you will FAIL at one point in your life. Fact of life, Little One. These girls are missing that lesson. We need to be teaching them that no matter how sucky their last routine was, they are still beautiful, wonderful little people! They need to know that they are loved and prized by other people because of who they are, not how well they perform.
Walking out of my last class, I saw a little girl (probably no older than five) in a full split, wearing fake eyelashes and enough glitter hairspray to style the entire cast of The Lion King on Broadway. She looked cute, I guess, as her mother gave her a pep talk. Eyes on the prize. Sure, I guess it was cute. I thought it was sad. Wouldn't that little girl SO much rather be eating a cupcake and coloring? Heck, I wanted to be eating a cupcake and coloring, but I am 17! I can't justify it, but SHE can.
Oh dear. I wish I could stop the music, steal a microphone, and will those mini-stars out of that place.
Carpe Diem, Girls! Sieze the Day.
Say No to competetive dance.
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Sometimes it's worth it. For girls like me we live for the stage, it's not about winning, it's about going out there and feeling like the REAL you, not some third wheel that follows someone around all day. You feel completely ridiculous, but you're trapped. Feeling like you can't go anywhere else because you're attatched, you want to belong somehwere you just... don.t. It's kinda like being a training wheel, you're needed at first, a comfort you get them going. Pretty soon they're confidend in themselves so they take one off. but you lose one and you might as well be gone too because they figured how to go on without training wheels. Dance is a lifestyle for some people they live breathe eat dance... I don't know about anyone else but those mirrors; the floor; the pain; hyperextended muscles; sprained ankles; torn ligaments; hips, knees, and ankles that need surgeries; broken hearts; pushing yourself too hard... it's all worth it in the end. It's my friend. I feel like myself it's the only time I feel whole; dance can fix anything even if dance is the problem.
ReplyDeleteI understand that, uh...Anonymous. :) I have many dancer friends that really do love it, and they're in it for themselves. The whole "why do I dance? Why do I breathe?" mentallity.
ReplyDeleteI'm talking here about the little girls whose mothers toss them into that glittering, fast-paced world without them really knowing or understanding if they like it or not. It's not fair that they should have their childhoods jipped because they are so involved in that one hobby. They're too young for that. By all means, dance your little hearts out...but for little girls, balance is more important than excelling in that one area. After all, it's not going to last forever.